Cancer Comfort Pillows: What do they stand for?

Cancer Comfort Pillows: What do they stand for?

          Every day someone else is stricken with Cancer and the aftermath of the diagnosis is devastating. You have to think of where your life goes next; Do you fight it? Do you give up? How sick will you get? How will it affect my family? How much will treatment cost? So many questions to face and that's not counting coming to terms with the idea that you even have the disease.

        When my mother was diagnosed and lost her life to Stage IV Cancer in 2014, we asked ourselves these very questions. During the visits back and forth to the Radiation Doctors (it was the only treatment really worth doing as it would relieve the pain she was enduring), she asked me and begged me to tell her why this was happening to her. 

         It was heartbreaking. In May 2014, just a month and seventeen days after the Doctor diagnosed her, we said Goodbye. It was while watching her go around the room, telling everyone she loved them by name, that I realized I wanted to do SOMETHING to help others who have to face this dreaded illness.

          First, I signed up for Relay for Life. I was familiar with races and fundraising, as in 2012 I joined Team in Training in San Diego and raised over $1600.00 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma organization. And then participated in the ½ marathon at the end to celebrate not only life but fighting Cancer. But, it was a struggle. 

         Back then, my heart really wasn't in it. I will be honest, I'm one of the ones who think there may be a slim possible chance that there already IS a cure for Cancer (at least a better one than treatment now) but, I have no proof. However, this isn't to say that raising money to find a cure is a bad thing. I pray it really does help.

         My mission isn't money driven though, it's wanting to help others find comfort while waiting for the cure. There are people who kick-ass at fundraising, but I don't. I hate asking people for money, ever in any circumstance. But, I'd like to think that I can help others feel better by offering kind words, a helping hand, an ear to listen and....Comfort Pillows.

        Shortly after my mom died, my aunt (her sister) underwent treatment for Breast Cancer. Seriously? Right? Hadn't our family been through enough? Anyway, like a champ, my aunt bravely fought it but her daughter told me of how uncomfortable the chairs were they had to sit in. How cold it got in the treatment rooms. Just how uncomfortable it was. Bing! Idea.

        I love sewing and don't get to do it enough, so I felt it was perfect to put two things I enjoy (sewing and helping a cause), together and that's how I came to Comfort Pillows. I don't seek money for them at all. I'm not raising money, I'm giving comfort.

       Each pillow is handmade using fabrics that I purchase from Fabrics.com. The stuffing inside is washable so each pillow can be washed a few times in case of sickness, simply use your washer and dryer. :). Best part? I include MATCHING pillow cases for each one.

       I've just started really doing this, and the batch of pillows pictured in this blog post are going to be personally delivered to the nearby Naval Hospital Pediatric Oncology Unit later this month. I'm only hoping it's a hit.

     Thank you for reading this post, please share only if you feel it in your heart to do so. I'd love to find other hospitals looking for a small set to add to their unit, not just those here in my current home state of Virginia. So RT away if you're on Twitter or any of the social media options below.

Thanks again and remember, no matter how you choose to fight Cancer, fight how it suits you best.

~Sarah~

Forward....Always Forward

              

         With all of the attacks happening around our world today, it's hard to stand strong and walk forward...but we have no choice. Over the last year, I've had to take a hard look at my own life. Where I came from, how that define's me today, and if I want it to be what brings me into my future. One thing I've realized is that I am beyond every means possible just flat out exhausted.

* I'm exhausted trying to please other people. Worrying about if anything I say, or how I say it will hurt their feelings, or make them question their relationship (friend or family) with me. I'm tired.

* I'm exhausted thinking so much about other people's happiness so much so that I've allowed my own to fall and  I've turned into a negative person. I'm tired.

* I'm exhausted trying to make things work to everyone else's picture perfect version of myself that I almost have forgotten who I am. I'm tired.

        For those of you who don't know me, or who have recently started following the blog...I lost my birth mother 3 years ago. Her death changed my life in more ways than I could have ever imagined. It was tragic. That bastard Cancer swooped in, covered her body in Cancer so much so we still don't know which one actually killed her. She was diagnosed on April 7th, 2014...and in the early hours of May 24th, 2014 (a month and 17 days later) I used a stethoscope and heard the final thump of her heartbeat.
         What you also might not know about me is, my birth mom didn't raise me. In a weird twist of fate, my dad got custody of my brother and me when we were toddlers. I love my dad and respect him so much, but growing up without the mother who gave you life? That's tough. I held onto years of resentment, bitterness, and hatred because I felt she didn't fight for me. I felt abandoned and it left me with issues that still affect me to this day.
           I learned that final month I got to spend with her (very lucky for that btw...) that she lived her ENTIRE life depressed. I learned that she was SO strong because she didn't allow that to take away from the bit of happiness that did come her way. She did live to please other people, I'm like her in a sense that way because when someone entered her life, she loved...be it a friend, loved one, stranger...you meant something to her.
          With her death though, I learned in the toughest way possible how short life really is. Before she died, we talked, made amends, we had begun to build a relationship. Then, she got sick and went down quickly. It's been three years and I'm still gasping for breath.

          The point of all this rambling is, I'm DONE trying to please other people. I'm a really great person. I give my all to every one of my relationships and I do it because that's what I want to do. I enjoy bringing happiness to other people. If it's telling a joke (I'm bad at those ha!), cleaning their home so when they come home from a long day at work, cleaning is the last thing they have to worry about, or sharing a positive quote I found because I think it's something they need to hear.

Life is short, and we only get to live this one once. Either we can spend our days worrying about walking out our front doors, worrying about hurting someone's feelings; or, we can have fun.


                                                                  LIVE. ENJOY. BREATH.

Happy Father's Day ~ A Reflection

It's the time of year where kids Give Thanks to the man (or men) who have given them life, be it literally or by being there no matter what trials have come and gone. Today, weeks before Father's Day, I thought I would dedicate the blog post to the man who has done both for me. With the help of my mother; he gave me life, during a difficult childhood; he supported me and even as an adult with children myself; he's the one person I know I can call on when I need an ear to talk to, a shoulder to cry on or a place to call home. 

34 years ago (gah! I can't believe that's how old I am), I nearly entered the world in the floorboard of my Aunt's car. At the hospital, my dad hardly had time to get the hospital gown over his street clothes before I made my way into the world. From how I hear it, he was the first one to hold me. 

Over the past 34 years (36 if you count being a dad to my brother before me), my daddy has weathered a lot of storms. 

A divorce from my mom, custody battles, and working hard to build a business for himself. He's stubborn but strong. He's hard of hearing but gives great advice. He's set in his ways, but lets you make your own decisions. 

When I was 17....I ran away from home and got married to the bastard who is now an ex-husband. Daddy knew, of course, but told me firmly that if it was what I wanted, then fine...do it. I hurt him. But, I respected him even more because he allowed me to make my own mistakes. It's a life lesson so seemingly effortlessly handed down that I'll never forget it. 

So, Daddy, thank you for being a strong, amazing and often times the most humorous support system I have ever had. You're an excellent Father and I don't think you are told that enough. 

Happy Father's Day!